I haven’t done a post about the newest products and fads in Japan lately, and I haven’t researched them for awhile either. I figured it was about time I catch up with what I have missed. Unsurprisingly, what I found was a bunch of really fucking bizarre shit that is going to give me nightmares.
I posted about the creepy life-sized female lap pillow before, but now it has a cousin: the half of a man’s torso and arm pillow. It is apparently a pillow for lonely women to pretend that have significant other to hold them at night, or for women who like to snuggle with dismembered human body parts but don’t want to worry about the mandatory jail time that usually goes along with it.
I can’t even fathom how you would explain owning one of these to a house guest.
The Anus Dagger: it is a dildo for your anus that is kind of shaped like a dagger. Really not that inventive, I was a little bit disappointed in this item but it’s name is pretty awesome.
The weird band that wraps around your penis kind of scares me though, and I am not quite sure how it works but it appears to be battery operated.
Hug Girls: It is basically one of those punching balloons you had when you were a kid but it has a naked chick printed on it and you can have sex with it. Plus it is also pretty much the same size which makes it even more awkward.
You also have to remember that in Japan it is illegal to show genitalia so there is some kind of weird looking black censor bar where the vagina should be. Really Japan, do you think that a drawing of a vagina is the worst thing going on in this picture?
Anti-pervert hairy stockings for girls. Apparently there are so many perverts in Japan that they had to create hairy stockings for girls to keep perverts away. Although you got to figure that if we have learned anything about Japan, it is that they have a fetish for EVERYTHING. So these stockings really are just an open invitation to all of those perverts out there that have a fetishfor girls with Sasquatch legs.
Wouldn’t it be easier and cheaper just to wear pants?
The Elfoid, it is a phone that looks like some kind of creepy alien from a bad Science Fiction movie. What is even creepier is that it lights up and some of them have faces and look like people who have been in horrific disfiguring accidents.
Kill it! Kill it with fire!!
This is a Japanese Masturbation Robot, it has a human-like hand and looks like it is probably going to malfunction and rip your dick off.
Have fun explaining this to the Emergency Room receptionist.
Fizzing Toilet Candy. It is a plastic toy toilet filled with candy, it is all the fun of eating feces without you know, actually eating poop.
I hope it has brown and yellow covered candy too, for the sake of realism.
Not quite sure what the hell this thing is. It is some kind of doll but half of it is robotic and it supposedly has realistic nipples. So it basically plays into some weird cyborg/amputee fetish that is pretty popular in Japan. See, this is what happens when you censor vaginas in porn movies. Stop it, Japan!
This is like a model car kit for psychopaths.