I have found some of the most awkward Halloween costumes for couples. I don’t know why any self-respecting couple would go out in public wearing any of these.
Slave Princess Leia and Jabba the Hutt
I have no problem with the Slave Leia outfit, I LOVE it when girls wear these out in public. But coupled with the Jabba costume it is just weird. Because then it looks like the 2 of them are sleeping together and like I said before this Jabba costume looks like a giant walking penis.
Matador and Bull
For starters, matadors kill bulls so this costume is promoting murdering animals for enjoyment. The bull costume also barely resembles a bull, looks more like a homosexual Minotaur. Although I guess this is a pretty good metaphor if you’re a married couple…
Plug and Socket Costume
This one has been around for years, we get it you have a penis and you stick it into her woman socket. Stupid! As if the symbolism isn’t obvious enough you have to wear the plug around your crotch.
Male and Female Blow Up Dolls
This outfit is just creepy, for starters these are the worst blow up dolls ever because they have no genitals or nipples. Second they just look awkward, why does the male look like a 70′s pornstar and the woman look like a frightened lesbian?
Key and Keyhole
This is just like the plug and socket costume above. They should have a version of this one for homosexual couples where the keyhole is on the back, that would actually be semi-original.
Sexy Ringleader and Clown
These 2 just do not go together whatsoever. Clowns are just lame/creepy and nobody should ever dress like one ever. Plus you have a sexy costume and one hideously awful looking costume, can’t guys be sexy too?
Lion and Poacher Costume
A sexy poacher? Really? Come on! There is nothing sexy about people that hunt exotic animals for profit. Do people even hunt lions? There are probably laws against that and I doubt there are any sexy poachers in existence. The lion costume is somehow even more effeminate than the lion from Wizard of Oz.
Ball and Chain
This costume just screams white trash. Does anyone under 70 even use the term “ball and chain” anymore? Would be better if the woman was wearing nothing but strategically placed chain.
Construction Workers
OK, construction workers are not sexy. Why do they make so many couples costumes that are blatant genital references? I get it you jackhammer her, I bet your significant other is thrilled by you pointing that fact out to everyone you meet.
SWAT Team costume
What is wrong with this one? The man has a semi-realistic looking SWAT outfit on and the woman’s SWAT outfit is not realistic at all. There is zero body army on that outfit and most of her body is totally exposed, making this outfit useless in a SWAT situation. I know it is supposed to be sexy, but it is completely unrealistic especially paired with the male version, it could have at least been a catsuit.
Baker and Oven Costume
You got your wife/girlfriend/mistress/cousin pregnant, good for you! I’m not sure why they didn’t make a sexy oven costume because there are enough sexy costumes made out of non-sexy things already. This is just stupid looking, the bun in the oven doesn’t even look like a bun. If I made this costume I would have put a baby doll in it and make it look like it was being burned alive. That would be awesome.
Come on I know you really want the clown outfit…admit it!