I am totally psyched for Thanksgiving, for once I don’t have to work afterwards because I am currently unemployed so I can eat all the turkey and drink all the wine I want because I don’t got to go to work! Yay! Plus there is going to be some pumpkin pie and I love me some pumpkin pie. But wait, there’s more… I am getting a second Thanksgiving on the Saturday after Thanksgiving because my mom had to work on the actually holiday and is having it at her house over the weekend, awesome! Double the turkey, double the fun.
In sad news, Wilford Brimley Cat, who lived next door moved out. His owners obviously moved out too but I don’t really care about them, their cat was pretty awesome though despite his problems with diabetes. I miss him staring at us through the balcony doors and meowing at me when I gave him the finger.
Today I got some ice cream cake because I passed my STNA ( State Tested Nurse’s Aide) class with a 98% overall score because I am a genius. I had 2 large pieces of cake.
Here is my new rap masterpiece:
Turkey turkey gobble gobble
gobble gobble gobble
Turkeys coming straight from the mother fucking underground
getting our asses capped by pilgrims because we’re round
running around all day eating our turkey legs
Indians putting our feathers on their heads cause they’re lame
Ain’t nothing glorious about being a turkey
Get your ass shot and stuffed with stuffing and topped with gravy
Turkeys all up in the bitch getting drunk on Patron
Haters gonna hate cause they can’t get me on their plate
Gonna bite off your face and serve it up with some cranberry jelly
Gobble Gobble Bitches
I’m out –
“I was 100% sober while writing that”