Top Reasons Against Setting A Person On Fire, and Top Reason For Setting A Person On Fire

Have you ever really wanted to set someone on fire? Have you ever needed to compare the pros and cons of setting a person on fire? Let me help you out with that.

Top 10 reasons not to set someone on fire:

10. It’s illegal

9. It’s murder, or attempted murder

8. You will probably go to jail

7. It isn’t nice to set people on fire

6. Burnt hair smells gross

5. Burnt flesh smells worse than burnt hair

4. Trying to get the smell of burnt flesh and hair out of your clothes

3. You may regret setting that person on fire later

2. It takes a lot of work to light a person on fire

1. You will forever be known as that guy that lit someone on fire

Top 10 reasons to set a person on fire:

10. You could record it and it would be a Youtube sensation until the FBI has it removed

9. ┬áIf you’re a cannibal, cooked human meat is tastier and safer than raw

8. You will forever be known as that guy that lit someone on fire

7. The satisfaction of killing or maiming your greatest enemy

6. The satisfaction of watching your enemy burn

5. The thrill of burning a complete stranger to death (if you’re into that shit)

4. It’s the best way of disposing of an unwanted corpse

3. You really want to go to jail

2. $$$$ if you’re in their will

1. There’s nothing better to do on a Friday night

Seriously though, don’t ever set anyone on fire. It’s not funny, and there is seriously something wrong with you if you are actually considering it.

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